Sunday, September 18, 2011

SSB

I know a lot of my blogs refer to some episode of Sex and the City. Maybe it is because I love that show, maybe because a real woman wrote it and it speaks the truth or maybe because I have zero life. Anyhoo, this blog compares to the episode where they discuss SSB. Secret Single Behavior. Now they are referring to hiding things they do from their significant others, while mine is hiding them from my newly acquired roommate. Now before any of your minds go in the gutter, I will clarify. For instance if I am working my 4, 10 hour night shifts, my house turns into a complete disaster zone. No laundry, dishes for vaccuuming is done. With two black long hair dogs....my carpet can get a little.....hairy. Not to mention that all 8000 dog toys are drug out across the living room. I also rarely shut my bathroom door. This comes in handy when I shower, I can hear the dogs and make sure the girls aren't really fighting. Now I have had to change my ways and it confuses the heck out of the dogs. Everytime I open the door they look at me like "that room has a door?," "whatcha doin mom?," and "nope, it wasn't me." It has also put a lot of stress on animals. They have to get locked up at night because otherwise they would attack the roommate when she returns from work. So this is how it goes....
4am: door unlocks
4:01am: Tess barks furiously, Dudley leans over the gate, and Phoebe barks from underneath the covers.
4:02-4:08; I yell at Tess to shut up which may include throwing pillows at her.
4:09: I give up and shut my door.
4:10: I start to fall back asleep
4:15: Craplin digs at the door to get either in or out of the bedroom
4:16: I let him out or in
4:17: Dudley jumps on the bed since whoever came in isn't going to say HI to him
4:20: I start to fall back asleep
4:35: Lola digs at the door to get in or out.
4:45: If I let Lola in, she immediately gets on the bed and tries to use my side as a balance beam. She is NOT light.
4:50: Phoebe grumbles from underneath the covers because somehow Lola has started to knead on her head.
4:55: I throw Lola off the bed.
4:56: Lola tries to get into the closet to rub her white body all over my black scrubs
5:00: I throw Lola out the room
5:05: Dudley sighs loudly and gets off the bed because HE is trying to sleep.
And scene.
My other SSB includes anyones bad habits. Leaving dirty laundry in the bathroom, shoes where-ever you took them off, and not washing the toothpaste out of the sink. It is bad habits to break and probably harder than most since I have done it for so long. I will continue to watch myself and try to hide the animals weirdness but at the same time I am ready to get back to normal...at least normal to me.

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